Praying Hands and Cleaning House

Let's start with the cleaning house bit. No, not my actual house. I recently went through the blogs that I follow list and removed several from my list. Mainly due to inactivity for more than a year. While doing this, I noticed several are no longer available and/or have no way to "Unfollow." I wonder how I can remove those from my list? Life goes on, I suppose...

I have done a bit more stitching on Praying Hands in recent weeks and have meant to share a post before now.

I'm hoping to pick up my stitching again in coming weeks. For now, I am taking things slow as I continue to deal with some health issues. Have a few more tests to do and then I'm sure there will be consults. Possibly surgery. But all I can do is put my faith in God's plan for me.

Thanksgiving in America

Today is a day we celebrate the first harvest in America. A day when Pilgrim and Indian came together to share that first meal. A day when families come together and enjoy food, fun, and laughter. Oh, and football!

Today, I wish all of my family, friends, and readers and Happy and Blessed Thanksgiving.

Self-Reflection on the 4th

So much is going on in my life right now. If I were to try and blog about it, I'm afraid that the posts would go on forever and be a jumbled mess. For now, I am going to say that I have a much deeper understanding of "battered woman syndrome". I put it in quotes because I'm not sure if I can classify myself as such, but I have been in a somewhat volatile at times relationship for two years, until last week. Unfortunately, I had to call for help for him. I wasn't going to let him die, if indeed that's what he was trying to do. I'm not necessarily afraid of him, when he's sober. He's a lot of fun to be around, half the time. Sometimes he's a bit frustrating. And when he drinks...let's just say alcohol and uncontrolled diabetes DON'T MIX! Now, he's in a safer place where he can't really harm himself, or me for that matter.

As for me, I am trying to just pick up the pieces and keep him in my prayers to God. I pray that God gives him peace, love, understanding. I pray that God fills him with HIS presence. I pray that he finds a healthy way to deal with his depression and alcoholism. I pray for healing. It's difficult to love someone who doesn't love themself, who doesn't know how to really love another. But I do truly love and care for this man with all my being. In this moment, I can't say that there's any kind of a future there, friendship or otherwise. I do know that he will always have a place in my heart.

Two Saturdays ago, we had a wonderful outing. We went to the Hillsborough River State Park and walked the River Rapids Trail. Neither of us are in shape to hike, so this was the best (and shortest) one to walk. Yes, that's him in a couple of the pictures. After our "hike", we went to Applebee's for lunch. We both enjoyed it so much we talked about going back. He's a cook by trade and doesn't like to eat out, so this was a big deal! LOL



Maybe someday we can be friends and do some of the things we talked about doing.

Maybe...
 

Searching...

A question was posed to me recently that has been weighing on me a little bit. "Where has that woman gone?" To put it in perspective, I was speaking with a colleague about various things and one of the topics that came up was my life in the Navy. Primarily, the responsibilities I held and who I was in those roles. So he asked me where that person has gone and how do I get her back?

The simple answer is "I don't know."

You see, when a person lives with depression, in any form, they tend to lose a part of themselves. I have battled this ugly disease for years and years. I have asked myself on numerous occasions "When did I become this person?" in varying forms. I lost a lot of my spirit. A lot of my life, over the years. I sometimes look at pictures of myself and don't recognize the woman in them. It's truly sad!

I'm not looking for sympathy or empathy in writing this post. I am simply putting it out there. For the world to see. To read. To understand. Depression is a demon, to put it mildly. And while God allows us to wrestle with the enemy, He doesn't give us more than we can handle.

I am still searching for the woman I used to be, but I think it's time I just start becoming the woman I am meant to be. God designed me. He created me. He gave me a purpose. It's up to me, through HIM and HIS strength, to realise who I am in HIM. And to stop searching in the past.

Death!

In the past week, I have had 2 deaths in my family. This brings the grand total to 3 for the last month. I am through with death!

On Easter Sunday, I lost an uncle. He was 75 and it was unexpected. He was planning his wedding for this summer.

I found out this morning that a cousin of mine lost her son, tragically, by his own hand. Suicide is so prevalent in the world today. I have been to the brink myself a few times. The last time was in 1998 when I was hospitalized. That and my faith in GOD is what keeps me from going there again. I cannot imagine what his mom (my cousin) is going through right now. I can only keep her in prayer, and the rest of the family.

This is a chapter from the Bible that is used quite often at funerals and memorials. It was the very first verse(s) I memorized. I am sharing this rendition of it as it gives insight as to the meaning of each line. Please take a few moments to read it through.

I encourage you, if you haven't already, please take that first step in accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour!

And if you ever know of someone who is hurting to the point they want to kill themselves, even if it's as subtle as "I just wish I were dead" or they are more depressed than usual, get them help!

HE IS RISEN!!!

 

January 1, 2017

This year will be a year of deepening my relationship with Jesus!

This morning, we had a wonderful worship service at church with a guest sitting in on the drums. He is 9 years old - and man can he play drums! Unfortunately, the video file size is too big to include on this post.

Anyway, this evening, my other half and I sat around the dining room table indulging in a little sparkly. I kept my limit to 2 glasses. While I was hesitant to try it because it's a red, Cold Duck is actually not that bad. Mind you, I don't really drink alcoholic beverages often and when I do it's typically just a glass or 2 of wine. Here's a couple snaps of of the flutes filled. I looked in several stores for flutes with New Year's designs already on them to no avail so I made my own. I used Puffy 3D Glitter Paint. It served it's purpose!

Enough about the alcoholic beverage. On to more important things: Jesus!

So after I finished my 2nd glass, we continued our discussion on Jesus but delved into actual Scripture. Yea, we discussed Jesus and Bible over bubbly. Remember, Jesus turned water into wine.

I reviewed the message from church this morning with my other half (he doesn't attend) and then we talked about my new Bible. He gave me a Holman Christian Standard Bible (see image below) for Christmas. I am loving it so far!

I read aloud Proverbs 31 beginning at verse 10 (the Virtuous Woman) and then the book of Ruth. It was pleasant sitting and discussing Biblical concepts and verses with him and I look forward to spending more evenings doing the same - minus the bubbly, lol!

Fear Leads to Life

Recently, I decided to do Bible roulette. Not the typical way I read the Bible, but I felt the need to just let God guide me this time. Anyway, after saying a prayer I opened my Bible to see what I needed to read that morning. It opened to Proverbs 19:23.

"The fear of the Lord leads to life, an he who has it will abide in satisfaction; 

He will not be visited with evil." (NKJV)

Of course, the version I read was the NIV:

"The fear of the Lord leads to life; then one rests content, untouched by trouble."

But after looking at a few translations, I found the NKJV was the one I preferred. I think because of the word "evil" being used.

So, I then decided to do a quick word study and looked up the following words: fear, life, satisfaction, abide. Here's what I found:

fear (Hebrew = yir'ah) - reverence

life (Hebrew = chay) - alive

satisfaction

• this word gave me some difficulty as the Strong's only showed  2 occurrences in the book of Numbers. So I went a little further and found another word.
• satisfied (Hebrew = wabea (saw-bay'-ah)) - satiated
• of course I then looked up satiated (Hebrew = ravah) - make drunk; fill; soak

abide (Hebrew - lun liyn (loon leen)) - continue; dwell; endure

So from this I got the following:

Reverence of the Lord leads to being alive; and he who has it will continue to be satiated;

He will not be visited with evil.

I am finding that by doing word studies the Bible begins to make better sense to me as I read it. After watching "The War Room" (for the second time), I realise that I need to be more studious in my reading of the Word. I need to read the parallel verses. I need to do word studies. I want and need to be ALIVE in Christ.

Maybe I should let Him guide me ALWAYS!

What's in a name?

I began reading Exodus again yesterday. Yes, again! I lost my place so I started over. Is that silly or what? Nah!!

Anyway, I didn't make it past verse 5 in the first chapter! D'oh!! I couldn't get past the names for some reason. So it made me think "Why are names so important in the Bible anyway?" I began to do a little research on each of the names of Jacob's sons. There was: "Reuben, Simeon, Levi, and Judah; Issachar, Zebulun, Joseph and Benjamin; Dan, Naphtali, Gad, and Asher." (Exodus 1:2-4, NKJV). I looked up the meanings of each name.

Reuben = behold, a son
Simeon = obedient; listening
Levi = attached or pledged
Judah = praised
Issachar = reward; recompense
Zebulun = to honour; to dwell (zaval) or gift; dowry (zeved)
Benjamin (hebrew: Binyamin)= "son of the right hand" or "son of the south"
          (this one is interesting because he was originally named Ben-oni, which means "son or my  
          pain")
Dan = judgment; he judged
Naphtali = wrestling; my struggle
Gad = fortune; luck
Asher = happy; blessed
Joseph = may he add

It's been said that people tend to live up to the meaning of their name. I can see where this is true in Levi as he became the father of the priestly tribe. Benjamin, or Ben-Oni, too as his mother died shortly after his birth.

Think about the name you were given. Have you lived up to its meaning? My name is Julie Ann and according to www.biblical-baby-names.com, Julie means "soft-haired", "youthful" and is Latin for Julia (which I have been called as well.). Julia can be found in the Bible in Romans 16:15. Ann means "grace" and is a derivative of Anna (Greek) or Hannah (Hebrew); found in Luke 2:36, 37. I can say that my hair is not that soft, I do appear youthful, and grace, well it's a work in progress, lol.

How to Read the Bible

What is the best way to read the Bible? Do you start at Genesis and read through Revelation? Or do you follow a specific plan such as Matthew 24, Daniel and Revelation to understand better End Times? Maybe there's a better way. No matter how you read the Bible, you should do just that: read the Bible. Study the Bible. Learn the origins of words that may have been taken slightly out of context through several translations.

Oh, and find the Bible version that best works for you.

Personally, I enjoy the New International Version (NIV) and the King James Version (KJV). The KJV because I love the sound of the words in old English. We don't speak with thou's, thy's and thine's anymore, so it can be a bit more challenging at first. Have you ever read Shakespeare? Yeah, it's something like that. I also am prone to read the New King James Version (NKJV). The idea is to find a version that hasn't removed verses because we have to face it, some versions are incomplete.

Here is a list of some of the more popular versions:

• King James
• New King James
• American Standard
• New International
• New Living Translation
• The Message
• Amplified

So, as I begin to read Exodus - because let's face it, sometimes you just have to start at the beginning - I will try to write encouraging thoughts from my readings. I will try to get on this blog more often and hopefully get to a point where I am on it daily - as the title says "Just Julie Daily".

Even angels long...

What things do the angels long to look into according to 1 Peter 1:12b?

"Even the angels long to look into these things."

There are many things I long to look into. Especially things pertaining to my salvation and eternal home in heaven. I fall short on a daily basis. Something I am all too aware of. Yet no matter how short I fall, Jesus is right there to pick me up.

So, I wonder if all of the things I suffer in life are preparing me for that life. It seems like a lot when I am going through the storm, but I have to stop and remember what Jesus did, on that day, on the cross, for me.

Vacation

I've been on vacation for the past week and it's been somewhat refreshing. Somewhat emotional.

My niece graduated high school, magna cum laude, and I couldn't be more proud of her!

Michael (the proud papa), Ariel, and me.

Now she has a few weeks before she heads off to college.

I went to church with one of my aunts on Sunday. I enjoy going with her. Although I do feel like I am at a concert during their worship service, lol.

I have been reading I Peter; well my church is doing a series on it this month and I am reading it on my own in addition... The letters are interesting indeed. One thing that struck me in my reading this week is the following verse:

"...you also, as living stones, are being built up a spiritual house,

 a holy priesthood, to offer up spiritual sacrifices 

acceptable to God through Jesus Christ."

- 1 Peter 2:5 -

I like to think that as I continue to grow I am being built up in Christ. I find that I am able to better speak about the Word, as was evidenced this week while visiting with family. I was able to add to a conversation and feel like it made a difference. 

The Book of Job

I have read through Chapter 3 in the book of Job so far. I am taking part in a Bible Study through Good Morning Girls. If you're not familiar, click on the button to the left or on the link in this post.

So, as I said, I have read through chapter 3. Normally when I read Job I just plow right through it. I have read it several times in my life. It is my all time favorite book. This time, however, I am reading it in a different manner. I am taking my time, moving at the pace of the Bible Study, and reflecting on what I read. So far, I feel like I am getting more out of it than I did in previous reads.

This book is primarily about suffering and what we do in difficult times. Namely, how we handle the storms in life. I know I need a lot of work in this area. I think that's why Job appeals to me so much: I can relate. I just wish I would allow these teachings to sink in; like the phrase "Storms in life" referring to Peter walking on water and keeping his eyes on Jesus. Once he moves his eyes away, he begins drowning. We all need this reminder.

Even though this is a quick post, I felt compelled to get it out.

2015 in Review

Well, the year is coming to a close and I really haven't done much on this blog. I feel somewhat ashamed of that, but I must press forward.

2015 began on a sour note for me, personally. Spiritually, I have found that I am taking baby steps, STILL. When will I finally have total discipline to my walk with Christ? I ask for guidance, His plan for my life, on a fairly regular basis. Sometimes I feel like He's there, and others not so much. I know that I have made mistakes this year; who hasn't. I'd like to think I have learned from some of them anyway.

So here I sit with 2016 looming around the corner and the only thing I can say is I'm thankful! Yes, I am thankful for the life I have. I have come a long way over the past 12 months in my mental health. Oh, I still have up's and down's. But I am learning to handle them a little better, S.L.O.W.L.Y. I spent much of the first couple of months hiding from the world. I would go to my appointments, work, church, etc. But basically I didn't want to be bothered.

During this time, I kept asking for God to show me what He wants from me. I wasn't sure if I would ever be truly happy again. I wasn't even sure if He wanted me to be with anyone. After the way 2014 ended and 2015 began, I wasn't even sure if I wanted anyone either. So I stuck to my guns and kept my nose in the Good Book not really looking for answers. Simply reading. Reading things that X pointed out to me. Reading bits that went a little deeper into the week's message from church. Sometimes even just opening and reading whatever page appeared. Not really a reading plan, but a start.

That started to change as summer crept closer.

My job sent me to Denver, once again, for the final class I needed. It was great to be away for a few days. After my return, I turned around and went on vacation for almost 2 weeks!! I needed that getaway. While on this vacation, I visited family in Alabama and Michigan and then found myself going to the East Coast (Let's just say that sour note turned sweet again and while we have obstacles to jump over we are looking toward the future). I traveled through 17 states during an 11 day period. 3,328 miles of roadway, scenery, and adventure! I'll post pictures another time.

So what do I have to look forward to in 2016 you might ask? Well, I have God first and foremost. I have love. I have health. I have my jobs. I am planning to go back to Michigan in June to watch my niece graduate high school. I (we) am (are) also planning the biggest adventure of my life: relocating across country. More on that later.

My heart and soul seeks Jesus every single day.

Getting back into the game, so to speak.

I am trying to get myself back into the world of blogging. It helps that a friend of mine is interested in starting her own blog and she's been asking questions. I am so happy to help her in her new adventure!

So, now for an update...

I have been going to a Discipleship study group at church for several weeks now. We are doing the Navigator 2:7 Series. I am really learning a lot; but not doing nearly enough reading. I know the discipline will come. I need to push myself to actually spend time in the Word. I don't understand why this aspect has been so difficult for me. Anyway, I am working on growing my discipline and relationship with God. It's important to me.

Christmas is just around the corner and then the New Year. I don't know what 2016 will bring for me. I can only pray that God blesses me and my BF and helps us to continue to grow in our relationship with Him and one another. It's been a long and difficult journey together. Enough about that.

As for my cross stitching, I haven't been able to do much. Once again, I have poor lighting in my house and my vision has been off (I think from spending too much time looking at a little screen, lol). I am hoping to remedy the lighting situation over the next couple of weeks by either re-arranging my room or getting a better lamp. I really want to get back into it and finish "Praying Hands". This is where I left off (and I may have shown this a few months back):

It seems like there is more done than this. I can't believe I haven't done anything on it in almost 2 years.

Do you know the story...

…of the brave little donkey?

“Once there lived a little donkey whose owner beat him daily. A gentle man named Joseph felt sorry for the donkey and paid a high price for him.
Joseph and his pregnant wife, Mary, were kind to the donkey, who felt happy again. Joseph told the donkey he needed his help for a very important journey to a town called Bethlehem.
The donkey proudly carried Mary and waited while Joseph tried to find lodging. Upset that there was no room, the little donkey brayed so loudly that the innkeeper sent them to a stable where the woman gave birth to her baby, Jesus, whom the donkey kept warm with his soft breath.
A brave little donkey carried Mary and her babe.
That night was born our Savior, in a manger now he lay.
God bless the little donkey and the journey that he made.”
*Taken from http://www.stjames-liberty.org/stjames2/2015-advent-calendar/legend-of-the-christmas-donkey/

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Here is the true story of the Birth of Jesus (Luke 2:1-20, NIV)

The Birth of Jesus

2 In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. ² (This was the first census that took place while^[a] Quirinius was governor of Syria.) ³ And everyone went to their own town to register.
⁴ So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. ⁵ He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. ⁶ While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, ⁷ and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.
⁸ And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. ⁹ An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. ¹⁰ But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. ¹¹ Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. ¹² This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”
¹³ Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,
¹⁴ “Glory to God in the highest heaven,
and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”
¹⁵ When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”
¹⁶ So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. ¹⁷ When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, ¹⁸ and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. ¹⁹ But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. ²⁰ The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.

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My prayer is that this post helps someone, anyone who reads, turn their life over to Jesus Christ. Christmas is not about the gifts that we receive, the shopping, the food…no, it is about the reason we are here and have eternal life: Jesus Christ!

Proverbs

I haven’t finished Acts yet and I haven’t started with the Good Morning Girls readings in Proverbs. I am a bad, lazy Christian, lol.

I have been keeping up with “A.D. The Bible Continues” on NBC though. I think tonight is the final episode in the series, but not certain.

What have I been up to, you may wonder, since I have been neglecting my reading. Well, I was in Denver for a week for another class at NVTI, UC Denver. I had a good time, as I always do out there. Spent much of my free time wishing I didn’t have to leave there but alas my job was waiting. This coming week I am heading out again. This time to visit family and friends for a couple of weeks. It’s a long overdue, much needed vacation. Here are some pictures from my trip west.

Denver VIEW SLIDE SHOW DOWNLOAD ALL

When I returned to my office, my computer decided to rebel in a BIG way. I was without it for about a day over the course of 2 days. I can’t imagine what’s gonna happen in July when I come back from vacation, lol!

We’ve also been experiencing some incredible orange sunsets the past couple of nights.

Orange Skies VIEW SLIDE SHOW DOWNLOAD ALL

Last night there was a partial rainbow in the mix. I love the tropics!

Well, I will get back into my reading. I NEED to get back into my reading and develop a HABIT of reading my Bible every single day.

The Abundant Life…

…not the redundant life.

In church this morning our Pastor made this statement based on the readings. We started a new series simply titled “Go!” As Christians, we are commanded to love one another. We are also commanded to “Go and make disciples” in the Great Commission (Matthew 28:19).

Acts

I began reading the Book of Acts a couple of weeks ago mainly because of the show “A.D.: the Bible Continues” on NBC. I realized that this show is covering the Acts of the Apostles and wanted to felt the need to read it. I guess that would be the Spirit nudging me.

Anyway, last week our church held a workshop over a couple of evenings and the presenter kept bringing up the Book of Acts. I thought that was a pretty powerful sign as well.

Sunday, the pastor ended a series with Acts 2. Hmmmmm, another sign!

I promise I am getting somewhere!

Sooo, I am now in Chapter 3 and find myself wanting to re-read what I’ve read in order to continue on into the next chapter. After discussing my struggle with the cares pastor, I find her suggestion to be more helpful: just read it through like a story the first time then go back and read it more in depth.

What I can say with some certainty is that it is in chapter 2 where we find the founding of the church. It amazes me every single day how profound that is and how much of an influence Jesus has in my life. Now, in the workshop last week, there was a question posed (one that I ask myself often): Who am I? Have you ever wondered who you are? Who you are in Christ. It’s a difficult question to answer even now.

I know that I am:

• a daughter of God
• a child of God
• a woman
• a teacher
• a veteran
• a friend
• a sister
• a daughter

I could go on and on, but you get the idea. But to really know who I am in the eyes of God, who I am in Christ, that’s going to take more thought. In life group tonight we discussed this as well. I have even more perspective: Who I am in Christ goes to not just an encounter with Him but when my knowledge of him clicked on in my heart; knowledge not just in the head.

So, who am I?

Crocus and Faith

I noticed something the other day as I was heading out to work. A little back story: John planted some crocus the weekend before he left. This was a little more than a month ago. Well, the other day I noticed something poking through the soil in the pots.

Crocus VIEW SLIDE SHOW DOWNLOAD ALL

While I miss him greatly and know that he may not be back (that is up to God), I am grateful for all he did for me while in my life. These crocus will serve as a reminder of renewal in my life and the love I hold for this man. No matter how hurt and angry I have been over the past few weeks, I know how I feel deep down. I only wish he could have believed the truth of my love for him. Either way, and despite all of the turmoil, I have forgiven him and pray for him to find peace in his life, wherever he may be.

Since he left, I have been meeting with one of my pastor’s on a weekly basis (well, missed 1 week but that’s ok). I am focusing myself on talking with God on a daily basis and working on my faith. I have always believed in Jesus and His sacrifice for my sins; since I was a little girl. I haven’t always walked the right path. This is what I am focused on learning: God’s path for my life.

I don’t know what He holds for my future, but I do know He is allowing the crocus to grow. A sign of His promises to us.