Cousin Johnny

Rest In Peace cousin

Johnny in the Navy (Boot Camp)

Johnny and Lisa at a family wedding

Johnny and me during a Christmas trip to Michigan in 2010

Epcot Birthday Celebration (picture heavy)

So this month I celebrate my 47th birthday. Ok, it was this past Tuesday. I decided to spend this past Saturday with my sister at Epcot. I purchased annual passes last year and they expire soon, so I'm getting the most out of them, lol.

Anyway, my sister is a floral designer and the International Flower Festival is happening at Epcot. Great combination! We had so much fun together! We hardly get to spend time together anymore, so this was extra special. Here are some pics from our day:

Took me almost 30 years to get a picture with Goofy!

All of the characters are made out of flower/plant materials; except Goofy, he's real! 

I am going to Epcot one last time this month and then the passes are done. I'm looking forward to the final visit (for a while). 

Death!

In the past week, I have had 2 deaths in my family. This brings the grand total to 3 for the last month. I am through with death!

On Easter Sunday, I lost an uncle. He was 75 and it was unexpected. He was planning his wedding for this summer.

I found out this morning that a cousin of mine lost her son, tragically, by his own hand. Suicide is so prevalent in the world today. I have been to the brink myself a few times. The last time was in 1998 when I was hospitalized. That and my faith in GOD is what keeps me from going there again. I cannot imagine what his mom (my cousin) is going through right now. I can only keep her in prayer, and the rest of the family.

This is a chapter from the Bible that is used quite often at funerals and memorials. It was the very first verse(s) I memorized. I am sharing this rendition of it as it gives insight as to the meaning of each line. Please take a few moments to read it through.

I encourage you, if you haven't already, please take that first step in accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour!

And if you ever know of someone who is hurting to the point they want to kill themselves, even if it's as subtle as "I just wish I were dead" or they are more depressed than usual, get them help!

Christmas Time

I miss what Christmas used to be. A time spent with family, gathered around the table eating a meal lovingly prepared by several members. This time of year just hasn't been the same for me since, well, the 1990s. I mean, yea when I was a kid it was about the presents. But let's face it, mom had to come up with some pretty interesting hiding places to keep me from snooping and finding them. I always found them. I always knew what we were getting before they were even wrapped and under the tree...until she started leaving them at her friends' homes, lol. But at some point it became about time with my family. Whether there was snow on the ground or not, I didn't care. I just wanted Christmas morning to arrive so we could pile in the car and head to grandma's!

Grandma went to heaven in 1993. Christmas has never been the same.

The family started doing their own things. Aunts and uncles became grandparents and turned their attention to their grandchildren (rightly so). And the family just kinda stopped being a family at Christmas time.

When I moved back to Florida in 2006, I was building relationships with my dad's side of the family, as an adult. We would either go to my uncle's and spend Christmas with them or to granny's to spend it with her. We eventually started spending this family day with my sister and her family: step-mom, nephews, granny, cousin, aunt and uncle. Well, when dad went to heaven in 2012 this too seemed to slow down. Sure, my cousins would invite me over. 

But it just hasn't been the same.

I long for a time when I can have a proper home (not this dinky single-wide trailer I call a home) and open it up to family for Christmas. To gather them around my table and have a meal, lovingly prepared by several members of my family. And of course, to exchange gifts and watch the excitement in the grandchildren's (grand niece's and nephew's in my case) eyes!

I pray that God will continue to bless me in that this can come to fruition.

I am listening...

We have been doing a series at church called "The Voice"; not to be confused with the TV show. It's mainly been about listening to and hearing God's voice when he speaks to us. Whether it be through Bible reading, prayer, in our hearts or even in our dreams when we sleep at night, God speaks to us. He can be soft and subtle, or loud like thunder booming in the sky. I have had moments in my life where something came across to me and it was most likely God giving me direction. Did I always listen to Him? No. Do I always hear Him? Nope. But I do try to listen to Him.

This morning, in those wee hours of waking sleep, I was dreaming. I don't know what the dream was about but I did hear something quite clearly:

"Friends scatter from friends and meet new faces."

I do believe this was God's voice I heard and I do believe He is telling me something; giving me direction. I don't even know if there is anything in the Bible that states this or anything similar. But it was very profound and very clear to me in my dream. (I did a cursory search on Google and couldn't find any specific Biblical reference so if any of you know of one, please share).

In other news, yesterday was our annual Hayes Family Reunion. I am not going to share a lot of pictures, only one. But I will say that I have yet again come away with a lot of new information about my family genealogy. It amazes me every time I learn who we are related to; that is, our family's connection to rather famous persons. This time we learned of our connection to General Robert E. Lee. Funny thing is, I remember sitting next to a kid in class my junior year of high school (eons ago) who was named for General Lee; and is a direct relation. Very cool to learn all these years later that he and I are distantly related, lol.

I am in the front row standing all the way to the left. My dad's brother is in the scooter (the only living brother at this time).

The next year should see me more actively involved in family research, especially as it pertains to archaeological digs in and around Sumter County. I'll talk more on that later.

As it continues to storm outside, I will close and leave you with this:

"Be still and wait on the Lord" ~ Psalm 37:7

 

Post Christmas post (pic heavy)

Well, I spent part of the afternoon/evening (prevening for those "Big Bang Theory" fans) at my sister's. Got to play with the grand-nieces. So much fun! While Jesus IS the reason, it's truly about the kids on Christmas day. Here are some pics of my day:

The nephew, his wife and the grand-niece: Melissa, David Jr and Sophia

My sister

The niece and grand nieces: Maislin, Kathy and Leighlan

Cousins

My step-mom has improved on her selections for me! 

(I really dislike the fact that I cannot use Windows Live Writer on this computer. My pics are so disorganized :( )



I missed my mom, niece and brother in Michigan, but kinda thankful I wasn't able to go there this time as they were without power last weekend due to ice storms. Yeah, I don't miss that weather one bit! But it would have been nice to spend the holiday with my mom. Maybe in 2014...

I also missed my dad. I really wanted to go to my sister's earlier in the day but she just didn't want anyone over before 3pm. I just didn't like sitting around all day and him not being here. We always spent a little time together before going off to whichever family member we decided to spend the day with. I couldn't even cry because it hurt too much. I had a minor procedure on the 12th and had staples in my scalp until the 26th, hence the "hurt too much to cry" as my facial expression pulls my scalp. LOL...TMI, I know. But all is well, the staples are gone, and the cysts are non-cancerous (per usual).

I did pull out "The Gardeners" and put some time in on it this week. I plan to work on it a bit more this weekend. I have 1 of 4 pages completed now. Whew!!! I think the coming year will see me spending more time on my UFOs even if I have to force myself. I have to finish "Coming Home for the Holidays" and Cirque des Carreaux" in 2014. I just have to! Especially the 2nd by Mother's Day. I would love for her to have it hanging on her wall by then.

Hope everyone has safe plans for Tuesday night! Don't drink and drive!! And if I don't get back on here and post before then....

GO STATE

AND

 

Veteran's Day 2013

First and foremost, a salute from one veteran to another: Happy Veteran's Day!

Secondly: a big WELCOME to any new followers!! I am happy to count you among my bloggy friends.

Many don't know the history of Veteran's Day, so I am sharing a link with you.

I haven't been stitching this week, but plan to round out my holiday weekend with a few stitches. More to follow at a later date.

I have some busy weekends ahead of me this month. This weekend is a holiday weekend, but I also attended a birthday party for my little 5 year old 2nd cousin.

 Today there was a Turkey Shoot in town, so I participated in that event. It was a fundraiser for Operation Outdoor Freedom, an organization helping wounded veterans get back to enjoying the outdoors. The highlight was of course the parachute jump. The diver was from Skydive City (right here in Zephyrhills) and he had an American Flag as part of his jump. AMAZING!!! While I am not brave enough to jump from a plane, I do love watching divers!

 

The long awaited stitchy post…

As I have previously mentioned, I haven’t had much mojo lately. I thought I would at least share what I have stitched on that little ornament I started a while back.

Yeah, I should be beyond finished with it by now, lol! Anyway, I have been spending much of my time either on Facebook playing silly games or reading my “homework” for therapy. I am also going to a women’s Bible study. I will be posting more on my writing blog about that, so you may visit/follow me there.

My job is keeping me pretty busy right now, which is a good thing. I have placed a few veterans in jobs over the past few weeks. I recently passed a state certification exam and can now add the initials FCWP (Florida Certified Workforce Professional) at the end of my name (if I so choose). Now I just continue to do my job and wait for my first of 3 trips to Denver for more training.

I’ll leave you with this image:

I got to spend a few hours with my beautiful niece on March 30th while she was down here for her Spring Break. We spent the afternoon in Tarpon Springs, FL on the Spongedocks.

~~~Until Next Time~~~

Sophia Grace ~ 11.19.12

Welcome to the world little one!

		Sophia Grace Sanford VIEW SLIDE SHOW DOWNLOAD ALL

Life Goes On…

Well, it’s been a little over 2 months since daddy passed away. I still miss him and probably will for some time to come. But life does go on as I am finding. I started my new job last week and am finding it fulfilling. I am working with veteran’s; a part of society that holds a special place in my heart for many reasons, not the least of which is my being a veteran. Yes, it’s better pay than I was making working in Corrections. This affords me being able to stay in Florida for a bit longer.

Now, to find a personal life, lol!

That being said, the holidays are approaching and I may post a bit more frequently as I navigate through my first Thanksgiving and Christmas without daddy. And I think about my daughter on what should have been her 16th birthday at the end of the year. I have strength through God to get me through.

Life and such

Disclaimer: DON’T CRY MAMA!

I was doing the dishes earlier this evening and about fell out. I really expected my dad to come into the kitchen and can’t figure out why. It’s nothing unusual, especially now that he’s gone, for me to do the dishes at least a couple times a week (I don’t dirty that many and can get pretty lazy about it).

This past Sunday, Amazing Grace was played during the worship service. I started crying. When I got home, I balled for a good 15 minutes or so. I really miss my dad.

I know I shouldn’t, but I have been feeling a little bad not having spent more time sitting in the living room with him these past few years. For my part, it was mainly because we didn’t watch the same things on television. So, I would escape into my bedroom and do my own thing. Now, I did sit and eat supper with him, most nights. It was on those nights when he was watching something disgusting (i.e. animals tearing each other apart, fish being gutted, etc.) that I had to leave and take dinner in my room.

Even now, I fight the tears as much as possible. Not because I have no feeling, but because I hate the feeling of being vulnerable. Plus, I am scared that if I start, I won’t stop and the Bell’s Palsy will come back.

Am I wrong, or is it pretty stupid to ask “So Julie, is it weird being home with your dad gone?” I mean, my co-worker may have good intentions in mind, but is she really that stooo-pid?! Before you make up your mind on an answer, let me tell you that it is a resounding YES! And not just for the stupid questions she keeps asking me, but because she doesn’t even know how to do her job.

Sandy, my 3 year old tan cat, has been more vocal than ever lately. I don’t think she has made this much noise since we got her in 2009!

My best friend recently told me she wished I would move back to Michigan. She wants me to see her son grow up (he’s not quite 1 yet). I miss her a lot, as well as others in my family and a couple other friends. But I really miss Christine. She was not just my buddy, but my scrap-buddy! (NO MOM, I am not moving back to Michigan. However, I may wind up halfway between if I lose my job with privatization looming, lol). It would be nice to be closer to her and my other family and friends.

Home and resting

Dad came home yesterday afternoon. He is now under hospice care. He decided he is done taking chemotherapy and just wants to let the cancer run its course. He’s been spending most of the time sleeping either in his recliner or in his bed. This whole ordeal has been so hard on me emotionally. I am losing my dad and my best friend all in one fell swoop. Sometimes I don’t understand why God deals hardships on people, but then again I have to believe there is a reason. I KNOW there is a reason HE does things the way He does. I lift my dad up to the Lord in hopes that he suffers little pain over these last few days of his life. He’s been telling me for a couple months now that he feels the end of his life is near. He knows his body better than anyone with the exception of God Himself.

As for myself, I am tired. Exhausted. Emotional (although not really showing it right now). Trying to figure out my next path in life. One major decision I have made is that I will stay where I am and have my grandma move in with me. If I cut down to the bare minimums on cable and phone I should be able to pull it off. Plus, my grandma will chip in a little to help pay expenses. She will also have more peace of mind in that she won’t have to live alone anymore. I just wish this were under better circumstances.

How am I dealing? I am trying to keep my mind occupied with my cross stitching, reading the Bible, and playing games on the computer. Mundane. Sure. For the most part. However, as I was reading in Revelations yesterday I learned something and that makes a difference in the way I look at a certain part of my life history. No, I won’t share the details. I just have a better understanding of HIS reasoning during that time.

I did learn something very interesting from my dad this past week. His favorite Bible verse (well, chapter really) is Psalm 23. I think many people like that one and consider it a favorite. For me, it was the first verse[s] that I memorised. My mom had a gold-plated plaque hanging on the bathroom wall and well, I won’t elaborate, but it made for good reading!

Ariel

Ariel taking my picture while I took hers.

My fave picture so far from this trip